TO HAVE OR NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN

…. “When people ask me about having children or not having children, I never tell them what to do…,” Morrie said now, looking at a photo of his oldest son. “I simply say, ‘There is no experience like having children. That’s all. There is no substitute for it. You cannot do it with a friend. You cannot do it with a lover. If you want the experience of having complete responsibility for another human being, and to learn how to love and bound in the deepest way, then you should have children”….

( from “Tuesday with Morrie” by Mitch Albom)

..I said yes to the challenge to have a complete responsibility for another human being, and to learn how to love and bound in the deepest way…

Here is my diary about  my journey of love, the memories of the wonderful moment when my children  took their first breath here in this Planet Earth…

January, 2003

..my mind flies back to this moment when I and my wonderful husband Erik came here for the first time in this barren-desert land, Muscat-Sultanate of Oman in Middle East. Never had I heard and little I knew about this country before. Faith then brought the two of us here with Erik’s assignment in the oilfield job in Muscat. A newlywed couple with abundance of love, hope and expectation…. Facing a totally new life away from the homeland, a little bit worried what to expect, but ready for the new adventure…just the two of us.

Our home far away from home: Muscat-Sultanate of Oman

Then not so long after that, I found myself pregnant… WHAT??? Should I be happy? Or not? Well… I should be happy at that time, but still I remember my worries occupied my mind stronger than the happy feeling. I really would like to have a child, but I just worried that I cannot give the best to my child with my condition: newlywed, newly mom, newly moved in a foreign country. Everything was just new to me. I know almost nothing in this land, not even a friend. I was so overwhelmed with a lot of adjustments…

December, 2003.

With the great support of my husband Erik, hand in hand together, we faced the big day: the birth of my daughter Aubrey Celestine, here in Muscat. I was so lucky to be able to access a great facility of health care here; at least it would lessen my worried on the delivery process of my baby for the first time.  To be surrounded with a great team of Obstetrician, Pediatrician and great midwives, nurses, and my husband Erik-a nervous father to-be, I trusted and surrendered myself in their hands…

I was so amazed with this little tiny creature before my eyes: so fragile, so precious, and so depend on me-oh my baby! Sometimes she smiled at me, sometimes she cried out loud. She was so demanding for love and care, leaving me the exhausted and sleepless night.

My baby Aubrey-now she is a big girl! She was so playful in front of our home in Muscat-a magnificent environtmen for us to live with the stunning rocky mountain view and sunshines everyday!

But, my baby, there is nothing you could ever do to make me stop loving you… no, nothing!

October 2009

And then….. Six years later, when everything was settle down, another new joyful moment happened again: the birth of my son Fernando, here in Muscat-Oman. Once again we celebrated the miracle of life in this beautiful and magnificent land-surrounded with the silent golden desert; the rocky jebels (mountain) soar up high, the elegant sand dune…. the abundance of sunshine, land of frankincense and ripe-sweet date fruits in the summer time….

The birth of my son Fernando …”There was something in the air that night, the star so bright, Fernando. They were shining there for you and me, for liberty… Fernando….
( from a song ‘Fernando”- by ABBA).

I wake up each day in this sun gilded land,

to see you grow and glow in this land

With the abundance of hope fill my mind

someday, when you  grow up,

this memories will be wrapped warm in your heart

with the values you’ve learn in this barren-desert land

to be brave and tough, strong and sturdy

“Aubrey and Fernando, my children of the sun-there is nothing you could ever do to make me stop loving you… no, nothing!

So I am, your mother, will proudly proclaim

‘My life is complete, I feel contented.

Aubrey and Fernando, you are my children of the sun,

My oasis in the barren desert land’

Muscat, Sultanate of Oman-September 2011

The full team of my family : we were enjoying our holiday by visiting the Science Centre-Universum in Bremen, Germany. When you see the background behind us, could you guess what kind scientific phenomenon we were exploring?

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4 responses to “TO HAVE OR NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN

  1. Couldn’t agree with you more, cintaaaaaa 🙂 hug hug hug for all mommies around the world

  2. Wow this was so detailed that I felt as I was part of your family. Muscat fully explains in those little words what it means to be a family and a mother. The pictures are amazing and I can’t wait to see more from you.

    To be a mother and also to take on classes may be tough but you seem to be handling it very well.

    • Yes Cynthia, from now on you are part of my family! A big family of Walden Uni of course!! Great to have you as a supportive colleague!

      Right now I am not just a mother and a student, but also a Kindergarten teacher too! Your great support means a lot to me!

      Regards from Muscat
      Evita Kartikasari

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